Let The Pains Begin!
by RedEyedWarrior
Summary: The Happy Tree Friends are taking part in the London 2012 Olympic Games. This can only mean one thing: CHAOS!
1. Chapter 1

**This is a three chapter story for the London 2012 Olympic Games. What happens if the Happy Tree Friends we all know and love were participating? Let's read on!**

_**Happy Tree Friends**_** belongs to MondoMedia. If it belonged to me, I'd make Flaky a lesbian.**

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**Let The Pains Begin!**

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The London 2012 Olympic Games begins! The Happy Tree Friends enter the arena! They are ready to win!

_*Static*_

Russell is standing upon the diving platform, ready to dive into the Olympic swimming pool. He dives and he strikes a pose. Unfortunately, it is not the right pose; Russell does the belly-flop landing in the water. This results in the water feeling like concrete as he lands in, thus leading to Russell experiencing immense pain. Nevertheless, he tries to swim, but he can't. The poor, light-blue otter is paralysed. Consequently, Russell drowns in a pool of blood and chlorine.

_*Static*_

Pop is standing before a horizontal pole suspended by two tall vertical poles. He is about to the do the long jump. He proceeds to run until he reaches a certain distance. Next, he brings the long pole he is carrying to the ground in one of its small, flat surfaces. Sadly, the pole lands on Cub, who crawled out to see his father perform from a better position while no one was looking; Pop forgot to hire a babysitter. The pole impales the poor little brown bear in the beanie through the head, neck and body, and out through the anus. Pop doesn't even notice his own son's demise despite the loud squishy noise generated by the impact, the blood making contact with various parts of his body and gasps of pure horror and the booing and hissing coming from the audience. However, this particular action impairs Pop's performance; he ultimately fails to reach his desired minimum height and he is decapitated by the pole he was meant to jump over.

_*Static*_

Handy is about to throw the hammer. He walks over to the handle connected to the heavy ball via chain. Before the orange beaver reaches out to grab the handle so he could throw the hammer, Splendid flies by in hot pursuit of Lifty and Shifty, who have just robbed a bank. Splendid emits a laser from each of his eyes as he flies over Handy, amputating the beaver at the elbows in the process. Handy goes his signature annoyed grunt. That was the fifteenth time since they arrived in England Splendid has amputated Handy. Turning a blind eye to the reality that he is bleeding profusely, Handy picks up the handle with his teeth and starts to swing. However, the beaver slips in his own blood and the ball lands on top of him, crushing his organs and the rest of his blood out of him.

_*Static*_

Disco Bear is on the running tracks. Despite his overconfidence, the orange bear with the golden afro is coming in last and the participant running in second last is miles ahead of him. Disco Bear is just too lazy and unfit to continue, but he simply will not give up as he wants to impress the ladies, all of whom are indifferent towards him. Disco Bear collapses all of a sudden. Next thing you know, Lifty and Shifty drive by in their van, running over Disco Bear in the process. Splendid flies after them; his laser vision cutting poor Disco Bear to shreds as he sails above the orange bear with the golden afro. Meanwhile, Lifty and Shifty passes every single athlete out on the track and are the first to cross the finish line. Fortunately for the athletes, Lifty loses control of the vehicle and they somehow manage to exit the arena without causing any damage. They finally crash into a lorry outside the complex where the Olympics are held, since Lifty is driving on the wrong side of the road. As it is a big lorry, Lifty and Shifty's van is flattened upon impact, flattening the green raccoon twins as well. Back at the arena, Splendid crashes into a wall, which is made of kryptonite for some reason. This leads to the flying blue squirrel's demise.

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**I will do the other Happy Tree Friends characters in the next two chapters. If you have any suggestions on what activities the characters I have not written yet should partake in, please write them in your review. I don't know much about the Olympics, even though this year they are being held in England and England is closer to Ireland, where I live, than it is to any other country. So suggestions on activities will be appreciated.**

**None of my OCs will be in this. I'm just letting you guys know that.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Now for the second chapter of **_**Let The Pains Begin**_**! Also, if I was the owner of **_**Happy Tree Friends**_**, there would be a second season to the TV series. Unfortunately, I'm not, so it could be ages and ages and ages before there would ever be a Season Two to the TV series.**

**Some of the incidents are heavy parodies of previous escapades involving the characters in the show. Some readers may therefore accuse me of plagiarism. Hopefully that doesn't happen.**

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**Let The Pains Begin!**

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Toothy is cycling along the track, passing every other cyclist out. He can clearly see the finish line. However, he bumps on a stone on the track, thus resulting in Toothy flying ten centimetres up in the air above his bicycle for five seconds. This is all the time needed for the saddle to separate from the bike, as Toothy, being the fecking eejit he is, did not assemble his bicycle properly. Therefore, the pipe that originally supported the saddle gets impaled in Toothy's anus when Toothy returns to his former position on the bike. Toothy screams in sheer pain and agony as he soars across the finish line. However, the bike continues moving and it finally exits the arena. The bike, with the pipe still up Toothy's arse, remains in motion until it is cut off by a cliff and Toothy plummets to his death.

_*Static*_

Giggles and Lammy are playing against another team in Tennis. Meanwhile in the background, Mr Pickles is standing on a device that shoots out a plethora of tennis balls. Angry that Lammy isn't spending time with him right now, the pickle jumps on the red button that fires out the tennis balls. The tennis balls are rocketed out of the machine and they pelt Giggles to death. Lammy notices this. She shrieks and attempts to save Giggles by fending off the balls. However, one ball rams right into the racquet Lammy is holding. The racquet immediately slams into Lammy's face, tearing the strings. By the time the frame is around Lammy's neck, scratch marks are evident on Lammy's face; both of her eyes are in half and a red pattern of squares can be seen all over her head. Suddenly, Lammy's head is reduced to bite-sized cubes. Mr Pickles immediately realises the horrible truth: he's just killed his best friend. Devastated, Mr Pickles climbs to the very top of the machine and jumps to his death.

_*Static*_

Sniffles picks up a weight, but he breaks his back when he has the metal bar at the same level as his waist. He bends forward in pain as he lets go of the weight, but his head gets caught under the bar. He dies of asphyxiation and a lack of blood flow to the head a minute later. Of course, he could have been saved if a certain referee bothered to intervene, but the light-blue aardvark was being very condescending and cheeky about the other athletes' IQ prior to the event.

_*Static*_

Surprisingly, the Mole has beaten all of the other contestants at archery, despite his blindness. The purple mole releases his penultimate arrow, but it fails to land in the dart board. Instead, it impales itself on Truffles' brain, killing him. The audience fails to notice this, as Truffles' is a rather seldom individual. The Moles readies his final arrow. However, on his last arrow, he aims at a fan before releasing the arrow. The fan deflects the arrow and the arrow impales through the Mole's chest, with the sharp end of the arrow and the Mole's heart sticking out of from his back. The Mole lands on his chest, revealing his pierced heart to audience and the Mole's competitors. Ouch.

_*Static*_

Cuddles is ready to beat his opponent in a round to Taekwondo. It turns out he is up against Cro-Marmot. Even though they are both living in the same country, Cro-Marmot is performing for Iceland, where he is from. Cuddles lashes out to attack Cro-Marmot, but he simply slams onto the big slab of ice. The yellow rabbit attempts to pull himself off the ice, but this leads to his skin being torn from him. Cuddles screams as he bleeds profusely. Panicking, the yellow rabbit kicks the bottom of Cro-Marmot's ice cube, but his foot gets caught on it. The kick also causes Cro-Marmot to lose his balance and fall on top of Cuddles, crushing the life out of him. Additionally, the impact of Cro-Marmot tipping over was so great the cube, along with Cro-Marmot, shatters to pieces.

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**So how did you guys find it? Yes, I know that Cro-Marmot's death is physically impossible, but remember when Lumpy, Lifty and Lumpy's pet elephant were falling from the cliff? The elephant fell before Lifty, but Lifty landed before the elephant, and the elephant is, like, ten times heavier than Lifty. Therefore, anything is possible in **_**Happy Tree Friends**_**, even if it means breaking the law of physics or something like that.**

**Anyway, I have eight more characters to do. All of this will happen in the third and final chapter, which could be up this week or sometime next week, preferably before the Olympics are over.**


	3. Chapter 3

**This is the final chapter of **_**Let The Pains Begin**_**! For the fans of _Unhappy Tree OCs_, an update may occur at the end of the month. That story won't be so much a major theme as the other two stories I'm working on. If I owned _Happy Tree Friends_, there'd be more female characters and thus more resources for Yuri fans on Fan Fiction Net and Deviant Art.**

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**Let The Pains Begin!**

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Mime is riding on his horse. He is not far from the finish line. However, the purple deer does not look too good. All of a sudden, Mime throws up and falls off the horse as the horse runs at thirty miles an hour. The deer dies from landing on his head, but the state his head is in is not as bad as the state his testicles are in. Ouch.

_*Static*_

Flaky is performing gymnastics. She is scared out of her wits as she bounces on the trampoline. She suddenly loses her composure and panics. This impairs her ability to land properly; Flaky lands on her back with her quills getting caught in the bounce matt. Lumpy, who is completely oblivious to Flaky's ordeal despite her screams, assumes he's next before anyone can stop him. To top it all off, the blue moose is wearing ice skates. He cuts Flaky in half as he bounces on the red porcupine. Fortunately for Flaky's supporters, one of Lumpy's ice skates gets caught in Flaky's neck. This causes the moose to lose his balance and fall over. He breaks his neck off the metal frame and dies.

_*Static*_

Splendon't, Petunia and Nutty are canoeing when all of a sudden Splendon't unleashes his laser vision, creating a hole in the canoe. Petunia gasps at this and scolds Splendon't for making a mess. The canoe begins to sink, partly because of the hole and partly because of Nutty's weight after eating too many sweets. The canoe hits a rock, prompting the green squirrel to roll out of the canoe and smash his head against another rock. Petunia panics and grabs the red squirrel's tail so she could wipe the blood off of the rock, only for her and Splendon't fall out of the canoe. A livid Splendon't impales Petunia off the same rock that damaged the canoe, killing the blue skunk. He smirks evilly at this until he realises that the rock is somehow made of kryptonite, thus leading to his death as he has touched it.

_*Static*_

Finally, Flippy and Buddhist Monkey are battling it out in a boxing match (Buddhist Monkey is representing Thailand, in case anybody is wondering). The cheers and whoops coming from the audience cause Flippy's post-traumatic-stress disorder to kick in. He flips out and pounces on Buddhist Monkey, but the yellow monkey is too quick. All it takes is one punch to the face for Buddhist Monkey to knock Flippy out. It turns out to be too much, as a matter of fact, since a hole becomes evident in the green bear's face. Flippy consequently dies of severe brain injuries. Regretting what he has done, Buddhist Monkey stands there and lets the audience – who are predominantly Flippy-super-fans – tear him limb from limb.

In the end, no Happy Tree Friend has won any medal.

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**Sorry if the ending sucked. However, I thought it was good. Please, if you are a rabid Flippy-fan, don't kill me. At least I had Buddhist Monkey voluntarily receive his karma.**

**I left the boxing for last because Katie Taylor won in a boxing match at the Olympics yesterday. I am thrilled because she represents Ireland. Her victory also motivated me to complete this story today rather than put it off until Friday.**

**As for the rest of the athletes in the London 2012 Olympic Games:**

**BEST OF LUCK!**


End file.
